Man's future predicted with true 'feminine intuition'
JERRY AULDS

As a general rule the predictive powers of a high school yearbook benediction ranks just slightly below "einney, meanie, miney and mo" (I never said I could spell).

However, the future hopes penned in El Campo seed dealer Jack Birkner's 1946 Bay City High School annual by young Jack's English teacher Mrs. Frances Shell did come eerily and unerringly true.

Birkner was struck both by Mrs. Shell's sagacity and her frankness when he opened up his annual earlier this year and reread her comments while celebrating with his classmates the Golden Reunion of the Class of '46.

Apparently, Mrs. Shell was one of those English teachers who believed in getting quickly to the point. "It's been swell having you, Jack, even if you did not believe in book reports," she wrote.

Then Frances Shell added the lines which were both wish and prophecy. "Here's wishing you the best of everything, including plenty of women," wrote the irreverent Mrs. Shell.

Even after 50 years the "plenty of women" quote shakes up Birkner.

But the wish for Jack by his teacher went from her mouth into God's ear.

In 1950 Jack Birkner married Mary Lou Quinn. The Birkners have four children, including three daughters, Kay Cole, Marla Menard and Patty Lampley, and one son, Jack.

Just for the record, Mary Lou is gorgeous and so are the three daughters.

The Birkners also have 11 grandchildren. "Only one is a boy," notes Mary Lou.

"Mrs. Shell's wish for me came true. I have the best of everything, including plenty of women," marvels Birkner.

The best of everything included a second senior year and a second 50th reunion.

"In those days you could come back for another senior year and in all my years in high school we never beat the El Campo Ricebirds with Glenn Lippmann and Jaro Netardus. So I came back for one more year, but we still didn't beat the 'Birds," lamented Birkner.

Birkner did earn a promotion by going back for a second senior year. "In 45-46 I was the class treasurer. In 46-47 they elected me president," said Birkner.

That is the best of everything - president and plenty of women.

I'll bet Bill Clinton wishes Mrs. Shell had been his teacher.

This classic column is a reprint from the Saturday, Dec. 7, 1996 edition of the El Campo Leader-News.