Course helps troubled youths' parents
"If you don't teach your kids, the streets will do it for you." - Delpha Price
By BARRY HALVORSON news@leader-news.com

In an effort to prevent youngsters from getting into even more trouble, the Wharton County Juvenile Probation Department started an innovative program of parenting classes last September.

The classes meet once a month for six months and are just now starting to graduate the initial groups of parents. The main instructor for the class is Delpha Price of ACE drug and alcohol services. And while stopping short of calling the program a major success, she did say there are early signs the program is going to be effective.

"We've done some follow ups with those people who have completed the course," she said. "And they say they're more aware of what their children are doing and the lines of communication are better. So far, we haven't seen one of the parents who completed the course come back while we have already seen some of those who dropped out with children in trouble with the legal system."

The program is being funded through a state grant obtained by Chief Juvenile Probation Officer Holly McCown, who coordinates with Price on the class. She said she concentrates on providing information about the administrative aspects of juvenile probation while Price addresses the more emotional and behavioral aspects.

The realization they need to be involved in a parenting class is a hard one for many of those assigned by the court system as part of the terms of probation. But McCown said it's as important for the parents or legal guardians make changes as it is the children.

"A lot of the parents initially say that the program is too invasive and are offended by the idea they even need parenting classes," she said.

"They ask 'Why am I here?' But once they recognize we are here to try and help their children from getting in trouble in the future some come around."

Price said it only takes a class or two to tell who is going to be successful and who isn't. She added some of those most resistant at the start become the most intense as the classes progress.

"At some point, they come to the realization that 'Maybe I'm part of the problem,' and they do need to make changes," Price said. "It's at that point they become teachable. They'll make some kind of connection and then you get the 'Ah-Ha!' moment where it all clicks."

Meeting once a month, the most important lessons, according to both Price and McCown, are teaching the parents to be parents.

"You can't be your kid's friend," Price said. "For example, you might say it's all right for them to drink as long as they do it with you at home. They're going to edit out that with you part and only hear they have permission to drink. And if they see a parent come home every day and relax with a couple of drinks, they're going to decide when they get stressed that a couple of drinks might work for them too."

She added that not being a 'friend' doesn't mean you can't get along with your child, but actually means you have to be more aware of them.

Among the things a parent needs to look for, Price said, are paraphernalia that goes with drug use, one of the first steps toward legal problems. "You also have to be up on the lingo so you understand what they are discussing. What you might think is an innocent conversation could easily be something much worse. Parents are the first teachers and first line of defense. And if you don't teach your kids, the streets will do it for you and you won't like what they are learning."

For those parents who complete the six weeks, the class is free. Those refusing to take the course when ordered or who do not complete the work, there is a $200 fee.

"I would prefer to never collect the fee," McCown said.